Friday, August 13, 2010


It's Thursday night. Cool pesky rain comes in fits and starts. It sprinkles just a little, stops, dries up, and does it all over again. Like a child getting over a tantrum when all that is left are the sniffles and the rememberance of injustice, forgotten as quickly as the clouds scud by overhead. The customers come in fits and starts also. Only the middle of August and I think the height of summer custom is over here at the store. The tide of business follows the seasons here. Like floating in the ocean and bouncing with the waves. There will always be busy spots, 11pm for some reason. People getting home before it's too late I guess. 1 or 2am depending on how late the bars are open on a particular night. There will be more and more time to complete my chores. You know, stocking cups, lids, napkins. Cleaning coffee pots. Mopping floors. All that really cool stuff I get to do while you're asleep. (Except for someone I know who is probably just rousing somewhere else in the world.)

So, big deal. What's your point here? Is that all you got tonight; silly descriptions of the weather and traffic flow? What are you getting at? What are you trying to communicate here?

Ah! Communicate!

Are you a good communicator? Do you always say what you feel or mean no matter what? Or does your own pain get in the way sometimes? Or not wanting to cause someone else pain? Or fear? Or self protection? Ego? Do you communicate with yourself in an honest way? If you can't be honest in communicating with yourself how can you ever expect to do so with anyone else?

Wow, lots of hard questions there Night Guy! Cut it out! I don't WANT to go there and think about that stuff.

Well we have to sometimes.

Me? Well, I'm a pleaser. I have hesitated to communicate my true wants and needs for the sake of a relationship. In so doing I have made myself and the other person miserable. I have foolishly done this a few times. No more though. If I ever want another person to feel I care about them in this lifetime I know I MUST be as thoroughly communicative as possible. I must acknowledge things to myself and communicate them.

Jeez, that seems like a tall order Night Guy. How can you be so sure you won't just slip into the same old patterns? Well, through vigilant mindfulness to start. Aren't we supposed to change and grow? Old dogs can indeed learn new tricks. And as they say in the sports world, that's why they play the game. If the outcome of every baseball or football game or soccer match or dragon boat race was a sure thing why bother playing the game?

To quote a Pete Townshend song "Communicate. Communicate. Never never hesitate." Will I succeed? I'll keep ya posted.

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